Identity

[P.s. those are my lips up there. I won't be putting any other photos or drawings up anymore other than my own.]

Update: My rugby team won 41-nothing last night! Though I only got to play a quarter, it was very satisfying.

We must identify ourselves in Christ rather than in the things we do or what we love. We are his product, and He is our creator. He knows us inside out, and it takes us years to come to a scattered conclusion about who we are and why we are alive. That thought is so inspiring and safe...to know we can always find an answer in God, whenever it does happen.
It's comforting to know that I can be myself around people. Even if I tend to be more quiet and introverted with people I don't know, at least I know my potential.
I want to contribute to making something big happen in our world. I have no idea whatsoever how I'm going to go about accomplishing that, but I know that when I want something bad enough (like most people), I get it freaking done! And I rarely have a frame of mind like that.

I think having my older sister and best friend gone for a long time (although it sucks and I would love to have her back!) has really opened my eyes to see that I need to depend on God, and myself, rather than other people a lot of the time. I haven't had a chance to run to her crying for encouragement or mercy, and I think it's been strengthening.
One thing I need to get off my chest is butterflies. The hopelessness of liking someone (even though I see them as wonderful) because you know that most things of this matter end in pain or doubt. A man in my life would complicate things so much, maybe even slow down the process of figuring out who I am and being comfortable with what I am and what I believe in. Yet the rememberance of looking him in the eyes can get me every time no matter how fast I sweep the thought away.

You could say I'm enjoying life right now...and trust me, that is rare and special! God is becoming real to me again. Friends are becoming more and more appreciated, and I love and thank God for the family that I have. I like myself. I like what I am about, what I value, what I wear, I don't scorn my thoughts or my puzzle of a mind, I treasure the life and opportunities that I do have.

A time to search, and a time to quit searching. A time to keep, and a time to throw away. Ecclesiastes 3:6